The Divine Miss Bette (Darlinghurst Theatre Company) ★★★★★

Written and performed by Catherine Alcorn after Bette Midler. Darlinghurst Theatre Company. Eternity Playhouse Mar 29 – Apr 1, 2023.

From gay bathhouses to Broadway and beyond, Bette Midler has performed everywhere. Everywhere that is, except downtown Darlinghurst, but Catherine Alcorn is here to, um, plug that hole in her schedule with The Divine Miss Bette. To misquote Tenacious D, “This is not the greatest Bette Midler show in the world, no. This is a tribute!”

As Miss Bette (Alcorn) takes to the stage, with the band live and kicking, and her trio of ‘Backwoods Barbie’ backing singers (named Misty, Fisty and Vendetta – like a particularly kinky set of fairytale dwarves) shimmying away, you know you’re in for a high energy night of entertainment. Alcorn has the voice to raise the roof and the comedy chops to leave you gasping for breath. Her version of Midler has the energy of an overly optimistic drag queen ready to milk every moment for a gag.

If you’re a fan of Midler’s 90s power ballads and are expecting a night of epic weepies, then you’re in for a shock. Sure we get serranded “From A Distance”, there’s “Wind Beneath My Wings” and, of course, “The Rose” but you’ve got to earn them, and Alcorn goes full Sophie Tucker before she gets us there. This is classic comedy Midler and it’s a riotous explosion of crass crackers between the tunes.

As much as this is a diva’s stage, Alcorn is supported by three of the best supporting comedy performances I’ve caught in a long time. Her backing trio of Misty (Kat Hoyos), Fisty (Kirby Burgess) and Vendetta (Tomas Kantor) not only give us great vocals, they steal moments left and right. The whole night is designed to entertain you every possible second, and this trio of daft dames give us extra laughs in every pause. When they get their own moment to shine – it doesn’t disappoint. 

I went to The Divine Miss Bette to hear great tunes and left with that sense of dissipated euphoria you only get from laughing till you have nothing left to release. Catherine Alcorn’s show isn’t just entertainment, it’s therapy.